Episode #47 - Jason and Mindy Dammen

In this week's episode we sit down with Jason and Mindy. My favorite thing about sitting down with these two was that they changed my expectations of what true love really is. I had developed an expectation half way through the Loveumentary Road Trip that all of the most amazing couples would be really outspoken, dynamic, and extroverted. I left Jason and Mindy's home feeling so... full, and yet so different from other couples we talked to. It made me realize that there really are no rules when creating your love. It can be whatever you want it to be. Whether it's traveling the world filming movies like Torben and Marissa, or helping underprivileged kids on the rough side of town like Ty and Terri, or raising an awesome little family in Nebraska like Jason and Mindy... there is no mold, recipe, or rule. You get to make it your own.

I hope you enjoy this interview!

In this conversation, we discuss:

  • Love at first sight.
  • The importance and meaningfulness of the "little things."
  • Managing finances and overcoming debt.
  • Marriage rituals.
  • Living your faith inside your marriage.
  • Marriage takes work every day... want to know what that work looks like? Good. We talk about it here.
  • Love will find you when you're least expecting it.

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Episode #35 - Jay and Lara

 

How Are You Choosing To Show Up Today?

The difference between the truly legendary people who leave a lasting impact on this world, and the billions of merely average and "good" people, is how the legends decide to show up. Every. Single. Day.

One choice made over and over, every day - to show up - is what made Michael Jordan into the greatest basketball player of all time. It's what got Abraham Lincoln elected as President. It's how Steve Jobs turned his vision into a modern-day empire. The decision to show up, to fight with conviction, to inspire, and to do the work that nobody else is willing to do is what separates the excellent from the average.

This principle doesn't just apply to ideas, careers, and companies. It also applies to relationships... which is why most marriages are merely average. Truly legendary marriages require a consistent effort and dedication to showing up that most people are unwilling to commit to.

Marriage is a continual process. It's a re-commitment to each other. That it requires continual forgiveness, continual self-growth and examination.

 

-Lara Ward

 

After talking to over 100 couples about love, I believe that what we've allowed our society to deem as a "good" relationship is not good enough. We can change what is acceptable. We can raise the average. We can pull ourselves out of the mire of crap that we all too often get sucked into.

Can you really find a way to let the other person be who they are, and can you be who you are? But you get mired in all this crap. You get mired in all the little stuff, and the pettiness, and the day-to-day stuff. Sometimes you have to remove yourself if you can, and take a look at the big picture. What's the goal?...At the end of the day, if I made her life special, that would be pretty cool.

 

-Jay Ward

 

The greatest relationships are reserved for the people who are willing to dig deep, battle personal demons, and show up every day.

As Theodore Roosevelt said,

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.

The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again,

because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause;

who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."

What do you think? Has our society grown complacent when it comes to love? What does it mean to "show up" in a relationship? How can you show up better? I'd love to hear your ideas in the comments!

[jbox title="Show Notes:" border="5" radius="15"] You can follow Jay and Lara's travels on Lara's blog here.

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